People worry when they plan to have a child. Well, let's try a plant child, they think. This is definitely not so responsible. After all, in a few months, they wake up in the jungle? We have singled out specific points. You can use them to navigate the stage of the plant parenting you already have and learn what awaits next.
Stage 1. It's just a little ficus!
At first, you dare to buy one plant just to green the space, make a friend, or have someone to worry about. Everyone has their own reasons. You saw cute pictures of ficus in your friend's camera roll and decided to buy yourself a little one as well. It's fun to come up with a name for him!
Stage 2. The anxiety of a young parent
It took half a day to find the perfect place where the angle of the sunlight is equal to the sum of the squares of the… Wow, everything went somehow far. How to plant correctly? Is there enough light? Will tap water hurt the baby? Is this pot big enough? At first, everyone is worried because the plant is a living creature. After a few days with a green friend at home, you start to feel how it enlivens the space and adds some warmth. Hmm, it’s time to get him siblings!
Stage 3. Vibing with my besties
And you bought your plant just one brother. And sister…more precisely, three sisters. Well, there were discounts on the flower market. Sometimes you cancel meetings with friends just to spend the night at home among the plants. They do not whine about relationship problems and new clothes 24/7… it feels nice. And they listen to you and all your stories — even about relationship problems and new clothes. Over time, you get used to such relationships, where toxicity can be only in the stem sap!
Stage 4. Beautiful and… functional!
Over time, the home garden grows, and you make a salad and think: why haven't I grown all for it by myself yet? So next spring, you plant mint, basil, and tomatoes on the balcony! Sure, you can make skin masks from aloe! And what is the name of that plant that you can dry off and make a tea of it? Maybe I need to subscribe to this gardening blog!
Stage 5. Your neighbors are beginning to suspect something…
…Because plants no longer fit the room! Little succulents in the kitchen, pothos, and bamboo in the bathroom. Maybe, decorate the porch with something? Do you chill laughing at plant memes, wake up earlier to see if a new leaf has grown, and have email reminders of the watering schedule? Mary from the flower shop is always glad to see you because you bought half the counter and always happy to see updates!
Stage 6. That's it
You are the person who leaves the party before everyone else to admire your home jungle. After the last yucca you had bought, your mother doesn't talk to you. To cope with this stress, you purchased a small succulent. Plant bloggers blocked you as you complained they were not answering a trillion questions every day. You chat for hours with others and follow the updates on gardening forums. Hey! Are you still reading this, or have you already left to check the soil?
Found yourself on these steps? We hang out here all together. In fact, plant parenting is a super hobby for mental health and the planet. Enjoy, green children grow fast!